Arrivé

Comfort is the watch word here.

Thats what I have been looking for all day.
This search began when I was dropped off at the empty house to unpack all my things (plans changed - no beach, no kiddos). Even before Mrs. S left for work, something in my brain started tweaking out, flinging questions like "Why did you EVER think you wanted to do this?" "A whole freaking YEAR?" "Are you actually going to be able to do that?" at my already waning self-confidence. Now, I am sure that less-than-one-half-hour of sleep in the past couple days might have been a contributing factor to this mess, but after talking with one lovely Glady I realized that maybe this is just something that happens.
So I freaked out a little about saying goodbye to nearly everything familiar, about working for and living with the same people, about feeling really profoundly alone. I'm sure it wont be the last time.
And I am going to allow myself that, and move on.

So I searched for things that gave me comfort. My sister left a gift for me in my suitcase, I put a couple photos up in some frames, I unpacked and remembered all the times I had gone through the very same motions before. I went on facebook. Yes, as much as it kills me to say it, facebook helped me feel less estranged from everything on that other of the map.

I took a one hour walk around town (got a little lost, turned into a two hour walk - but at least I was DOING something. And I found my way in the end). It felt good.

Is it just me, or does anyone else find it very difficult to play the tourist solo? I didn't take any pictures today, and desperately tried not to pull out my emergency map. But I figure there will be plenty of time to get to know the town and take plenty of pictures.
I have nearly a year left, after all.